What I Imagine is Going on in M4WW Craigslist Missed Connections

You:  Couple a babes
Me:  Guy parting long blond bleached hair horribly burned by the sun to leer at you both properly.  I wanted to talk to you both, and I was getting my opener ready where I was gonna come over to the table with a sugar packet and say pour some sugar on me, especially the dick part of me.  I spent a lot of time looking for sugar because I could only find Equal.  By the time I decided to just say, 1 + 1+ 1 = awesome, you were gone.  Maybe I’ll see you again!

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Holy shit, I’ve been thinking about you.  You were two blonde twins.  I think you were twins.  Or maybe sisters.  For some reason I feel this is gross and inappropriate if you’re sisters, but if you’re TWINS, KABOOM!, please call me and let’s have sex because I feel like that would work out just fine.  It never works if sisters fuck the same guy 5 years apart, but twins banging the same guy at the same time?  Shouldn’t be a big deal.

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Hot mother/daughter duo out at the grocery store!  You were both so good looking.  Especially your parts!  Hope this doesn’t sound weird, but I would like to cut off your parts and hang them on my wall so that I could stare at them as they rotted in my un-air-conditioned home.  Email if you’re interested.  Just so I know it’s you, tell me what color the tennis balls stuck to the bottom of my weird canes were.