The Level of Emergency Required to Call Me in the Morning: A Reference Chart

Noon:  “Have you seen the new Muppets trailer?”

11 AM:  “I think I might have left my Muppets DVDs at your house.”

10 AM:  “I just remembered that Muppet Babies is a thing.”

9 AM:  “I just remembered that Muppet Babies is a thing.  I must have watched that show 40,000 times.  I’m a little worried that my brain may be severely damaged.”

8 AM:  “There is a man in a Muppet costume trying to break into my home.”