“NO GAME OF THRONES SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW!
I just feel like the world is basically one big GoT spoiler right now. But it’s hard for me to tell because I’ve NEVER SEEN IT.
I have a rule: No dragons.
It might be a bit restrictive, but hey, it’s worked for me so far.
I saw the one where dragons took over the world or whatever. Dragonworld? Dragontown? Whatever that one was, and it sucked.
I also saw How to Train Your Dragon in 3D. I was there with a child who suggested we trade 3D glasses. Which I did before I realized he’d smeared peanut butter cup grease all over them, which ruined them. Comprehensively.
But it’s not just about a couple bad times. I just think dragons are sort of…stupid. A big flying lizard that can shoot fire? Hello!? It’s called a dinosaur, assholes!
Oh, you’re saying dinosaurs are more like birds and don’t shoot fire? Yes, more great information from scientists. And scientists wonder why nobody likes them. Maybe because you take away all our cool dinosaurs, 10% of our planets, and what do you give us back? Usually a new substance that causes cancer. Thanks a shitload. “