“Um, also, just to be safe, we made this robot no stronger than a small child. We had some issues where previously they were stronger than ten men for no real reason, but we phased that out. So you should be able to easily overpower it if something goes haywire.”
“Oh, and the airlock release is right over there. We had a sort of a thing where a guy went Space Crazy and shot someone out the airlock. So now we’re required to put a release inside, just in case. Couldn’t hurt.”
“Uh, no. This ship isn’t equipped with a self-destruct. The applications just don’t seem realistic.”
“This really dangerous piece of industrial equipment? Oh, it takes five men simultaneously pushing buttons to even turn it on, so there’s no worries about a psycho trapping you on one of the conveyors and starting it.”
“Instead of transporting dangerous prisoners, we just make them stay where they are. They’re in prison, so what the hell were we doing all that transporting for?”
“I know this is going to sound crazy, but when someone tells me something weird is going on, even if they say it’s a goblin or whatever, as an officer, I go ahead and check it out with at least one partner. We used to say, “Whatever, kid” and just leave, but the department has changed policy.”
“This chainsaw is designed with a safety. If you swing it too fast and in too long an arc while it’s running, it shuts off. There’s no reason you should be just swinging a chainsaw around like a crazy person. We’ve gotten a lot of positive feedback and prevented a lot of on the job accidents.”
“Ten years ago we made about 50 different proposals for stopping an asteroid from hitting the earth. We then pared that down to 12 based on our ability to do them and the ability to do those 12 simultaneously without disrupting any of the other plans. So when we see the asteroid coming, we should have a fairly organized procedure ready to go. You can’t just last minute these things.”
“Well, I wouldn’t say our vault is impenetrable. But we stopped stacking the money and leaving a bunch of potato sacks all over. It’s fairly inconvenient to get it all off the shelves. So even if you got in, which feels pretty unlikely, it would take so long to get a significant amount of money that you couldn’t make off with more than 10,000 or so.”
“We hire excellent security guards. We only take highly-educated people who we then send to several months of training, including secret service training and training with Israeli airport security. We’ve found that this makes it both a positive experience for them, and that they provide decent security as well and are not flustered by a smoke can, and they don’t spend their time reading full newspapers in front of the monitors.”