“Pete’s Overly-Detailed Explanation of Why He Doesn’t Love Saga, Which Nobody Asked For
Part 3
I don’t think I’ve ever experienced having super mechanical sex with someone while we had a super mundane conversation throughout the entirety of the encounter. This could be
A) An intimacy issue, somehow that’s too intimate for me
B) A fitness issue, sort of like chatting while doing a run-up for a long jump
C) Because most people don’t actually do this
It happens in Saga with a weird frequency. I don’t really know why they’re banging and chatting about work, or about something that doesn’t really matter, something unrelated to sex. It’s a little bit American Psycho, when you start thinking about it too much, like I have.
I almost want to give it credit, that it’s a huge meta joke. They always say it’s good to give characters some physical business while they have a conversation. Keeps things lively. So maybe that’s what this is, a commentary on that piece of advice. But I don’t know. It seems more like, “We gotta have these alien paparazzi dudes get out all this exposition. Let’s just have them bang while they do so.”
I’m posing a theory, which is that Hazel is so special not because she’s the only child born of both winged and horned parents (c’mon, am I really to believe that?), but because most sex never reaches climax as most sex ends because of a conversational turn.
Also, how come all these aliens seem to have sex the exact same way? Horn heads, winged people, TV head robots, green alien guys who look like Beast Boy. Even a space dragon has a dong in about the spot you’d think, if you were thinking in a human-centric way. Even topless spider woman sort of lays down on her back and The Will has sex with her…on her…to her…whatever, without getting even more pornographic, I can’t see the mechanics, but you get it.”