“”Sometimes the weight of armor is harder to bear than the weight of the past.”
Oh, barf.
Red Sonja is Conan but without the spectacle of seeing an actual human play the role, and without that Wheel of Death thing that was…I don’t even know what that was, a drill to hell?
Red Sonja is just kind of flavorless. I’m not a sword and sandals guy, and I’m not a sword and sandals guy because stuff like this. This character is boring, the setting is boring, there’s no real plot. It’s like a B movie someone shot on VHS: just characters wandering around in the woods, punctuated by occasional action that has no stakes or ideas.
Sword and sandal stuff is too like this too often, just a generic plot where a bad king is doing a hostile takeover from a good king or whatever. And the only person who can stop the bad guys, usually composed of a monster army of some kind, who have aligned with the evil-doer for no real reason, is our hero, even though you’d think that a successful kingdom in such violent times would probably be able to defend themselves from just about any threat, at least marginally.
Also, for this being from Gail Woman In The Fridge Simone, I couldn’t help but notice that our heroine is de-powered by a plague and left to die in the snow. Just sayin’. “