Q: Do they make special “Leanin’ Shovels”? I only ask because I see a lot of really professional leanin’ happening on shovels. I know that a normal shovel is designed for digging as opposed to leaning, so it makes me question if you’ve got access to a different shovel type or if this is a skills-based maneuver?
Q: Are you jealous of your building construction counterparts because women passing by are mostly concealed by their vehicles and so you’re forced to catcall based facial features alone (“Nice nose bridge, baby!)?
Q: Are street sweepers part of your crew at all? Because those guys may not only be making little progress but actually make things worse. They appear to be just swirling the garbage around. Are they just swirling the garbage around?
Q: While we’re on the topic of street sweepers, do their wives get mad because they come home and a peanut butter mess has been “cleaned” by swirling a brush over the glob for about two seconds?
Q: Would it be possible to at least hold a clipboard if you’re not doing anything else? And to just point around at stuff so that when we’re stuck in traffic and you’re talking about a sports team you fancy, that way we could at least feel like you were trying sort of?
Q: Do you consider the fact that cops abuse your slower speed areas on non-work hours as a collection of blood money?
Q: Has anyone considered the possibility of making a truck that does more than one thing? You’ve got the paver, maybe it could also have an arm attached that continuously waves traffic by?
Q: Do the lady road workers consider the rockin’ tan a fringe benefit?
Q: Do you realize that you’ve created a profession out of watching powerful machines doing the work of men, a character that only exists in road work and the most boring parts of the Transformers film franchise?