Pros and Cons of Taking Nearly a Week Off Work to do Almost Nothing

Pro: Lots of rest.

Con: Much of this rest comes in the form of post-beer sleep, which results in nightmares about taking a vacation to Jordan and being unsure what to load on my iPod for the trip.

Pro: Plenty of time to cook and freeze meals.

Con: The one time the power goes out in my building falls on the very day I finish cooking up three week’s worth of meals and putting them in the freezer.

Pro:  Good time to catch up on chores.

Con: Also a very good time to catch up on old Twilight Zone episodes while finding the edge where you’ve eaten just enough cheeseballs (stomach ache) versus too many cheeseballs (diarrhea madness).

Pro: Plenty of time to open the windows and take in the winter weather.

Con: Plenty of time to forget about closing same windows until you realize what it must look like to walk past a kitchen lit only by the microwave where a nude person is popping popcorn, dancing in front of the microwave and making saxophone noises that mimic the theme song to Roseanne.

Pro:  Fewer worries about personal appearance.

Con:  Taking out what you thought was smelly garbage before coming to the conclusion that the smelly garbage was the smell of your torso.

Pro: Chance to go out to nice breakfast with family.

Con: Stumbling into breakfast place and ordering 400 coffees as though you were on a plane at night.  At 11.