Vanilla Bean
This smellsouous candle brings out the warmth in even the coldest of rooms. Even if you live in a small apartment mostly underground, the aroma, not unlike baking cookies, will never fail to remind you of the motherly relative you never had who you imagine would have done things for you like bake cookies and not let you go to elementary school dressed in sweats with a giant hole in the ass.
Cinnamon Oak Grove
Imagine a peaceful autumnal day where the sun is shining through the spaces between leaves and each ray of light warms your skin and brings you to life, one quarter inch at a time. That, and just a hint of burning weasel corpse. We’re working on it.
Berry Bonanza
This one is on the sweeter side with notes of wild strawberries, Sunday picnics, and cotton candy melted in a glass of water and then chugged at full speed while a pixie dusts your open eyes with sugar granules.
Milk and Honey
This classic scent attracts both bees and children. Nothing like a room full of agitated bees and children. I try to tell the children to use the fire to fight off the bees, but they never listen. God, they never listen, and as I put on my bee suit to remove their bloated, swollen corpses, I think, Why? Why won’t they listen? If they just sacrificed one of their own, burnt his fresh corpse and used the fire and smoke to fight off the bees, they could win. One day. One day.