The world of Scrabble. What a fascinating ride it would be. It turns out, the only thing worse than Scrabble is people who are really good at it. It’s like every crazy person who tried riding a unicycle in college to be different came in the same room to challenge each other at a boring game and not showering.
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Drank all the beer in the fridge almost immediately. Woke up and the fridge was filled with bags of donated blood. I had no idea where it came from. I threw the fridge off one of those dumb cobblestone bridges and went home.
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I made two very important discoveries. One: MOST Chinese food is not from China. Two: Strangely, EVERYTHING else is. I also made a third less important discovery, which is that a place advertising $1.50/scoop Chinese food sounds like a bargain, but the city miles it puts on a toilet negate the investment quickly.
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My daughter said that if we had half as big of a house and half as nice a car, we could give something really nice to charity. Luckily, someone stabbed her. I’ve learned from that Hayley Joel Osmet movie that this is what happens to kids who get too big for their own good.
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The good part of moving off the grid was the gun shooting. The bad part was everything else. And I couldn’t grow a beard, so I had to do a lot of gun shooting so people would think I was legit. I shot my own trailer to pieces so much it collapsed on top of me. I shot my way out through the debris and went home.