Volume 2:
My first book of 2024! And it was alright!
Okay, it was pretty good. It had some very Lost vibes where the volume kind of putters along, then ends in a place that makes you go, “Goddamn it, now I’ll be reading the next one, I suppose, but by FORCE.”
I’ve been enjoying these darker manga that sort of ask the question of what makes life worth living, but also, it’s a little depressing because the main character in this book probably is more “alive” in his horrible situation than he would be in MY life situation.
Which, you know, doesn’t sting that bad because I AM dead inside, but it’s like, damn, do you have to remind me? Can’t I read these books to escape the emptiness of my own existence?
TBH, I’m just in the dumps because I have to go to the dentist next week. It’s time again. It comes around so fast. I’ve been tortured at the dentist so much that I dread going, even though I don’t usually have bad appointments anymore.
Kids, let this be a lesson: soda is not an appropriate drink to accompany breakfast, and toothbrushing is not a “sometimes” activity. You’ll get dental insurance in your mid-20’s and have to answer questions like, “Did you grow up drinking well water?”
Volume 3:
I didn’t realize how many people discovered this because it’s a Netflix series, but there you go. Can they make a John Swartzwelder Netflix series already? So people can discover him? Can they just put up a thing that’s like, “Coming Soon: Some John Swartzwelder Shit” and then make a 1-minute preview for a show that’s never further filmed?
The man has given us so much. Can’t we at least give him that?
Volume 4: Volume 4, still no Alice. False advertising. Lawsuit.
And I googled it, “Arisu” sounds a little like Alice, but I’m not buying that.
Volume 5:
I read a review of one of these that was something about watching the Netflix show and then indulging in “the feminine urge to consume anything related to something you like.”
I was confused by this, but upon googling, found a New York Times article that explained the “the feminine urge to…” meme.
I am a middle-aged man googling memes, finding NYT explainers on them.
You can’t kill me. I’m already dead.
Volume 6:
You know what I’m finding to be a manga staple? Flexible rules about what would and would not kill someone.
Sometimes, a guy gets punched a lot, and he dies.
Other times, he gets hit in the head with a brick thrown from a moving car, and he’s fine.
I guess that’s kind of how reality works. Some dude gets hit with a brick, and he’s totally fine. Some other dude steps off a curb wrong and he’s dead.
Here I am, criticizing manga. Meanwhile, Reacher, a human-bear hybrid, is walking around doing shit that Colossus from X-Men would find too strength-intensive.
Can Reacher even use a pencil? Does it just powderize as soon as he lays hands on it?
Volume 7: I know it’s a dark and unyielding world…but I wouldn’t mind the option to have sex with a doctor as opposed to paying a medical bill. Honestly, based on an ER visit for a busted toe, I think my “gifts” would be wildly overvalued if they covered that bill.
Volume 8: I thought this whole series was out, but we’ve still got two months to wait.
This is what I get for not paying attention in Japanese class. And for not going to a school that offered Japanese. And for being born before 2015 when you could learn online. And for still not availing myself of any of that stuff, just thinking it’s nice to have options.