Less Successful Sequels to If You Give a Mouse a Cookie

If You Give a Goose a Six-Pack

If You Give a Ferret a Habitat in Your Home for Some Reason

If You Give a Cat Even One Goddamn Inch

If You Give a Bear Your Life in Exchange for Some Extremely Good Documentary Footage

If You Give a Dog Mean Eyebrows with a Permanent Marker

If You Give a Fish Almost Anything