Pete’s Various Theories on the Causes of Boners Through His Lifetime

Age 5:  A bone happens in my peep.

Age 10: It feels like my peen is full of pee.  Like a pee balloon.  But nice pee.

Age 15: Boobs.

Age 17: Blood filling spongy tissue.

Age 19: Butts.

Age 23: Loving intimacy.

Age 25: Doggystyle loving intimacy.

Age 28: Sleeping on my stomach.

Age 34: Everything.  AND nothing.

Age 45: Memories from earlier ages.

Age 56: Memories of the memories from earlier ages.

Age 67: A combination of pills and randomly firing synapses.